4.30.24

a restless night of mundane activities, picking up stones, placing them in grooves, most seemingly seated for them… a fruit basket of gnomes, a tree dangling from stone, and a rat laid perfectly at rest on the sidewalk road as a signpost for my walk home…

Just happens the last of the month, 2 moments of clarity come and sit with me. Sending off a new friend into a forced journey of reconnection, processing, and financial burden, hearing of their mixed emotions and understanding how they see their confusion, process their emotions, comforted by the genuineness of their heart. Rubs off as I know I wanted to make myself available for them as well. Thank you Joe for your reminders that all things are fleeting, all things come and go, and the people who do, I really wonder what would I do without them — and this was all connected to hearing, “if something leaves and it doesn’t come back to you, it never belonged to you.” in something I watched last night. The people I find bring value and sun to my garden, (lu, herb, connor, jerome, justin, joe, etc.), if they left, what am I to do with my life? Am I continuing to build, grow, question, experiment, and arise anew?

now working with Piko Bem, with Ben, a heart and appreciation also repaired and lensed in a way very similarly. Speak carefully, with height, with vigor, with vision, movement is made by seeds planted, culitvated — are other guidances of life replicable in new forms of expression? are cycles of life most worked through, what all has been done is wrong, and only radical unkept systems left to let lead?